Monday, April 2, 2012

Quotation Inspiration

"Find a quote that inspires you (either positively or negatively) and free write about it for 15 minutes."


“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”
-Lao Tzu

My whole life, I have been very lucky to have a huge support system. My huge family is crazy, and some of them often ignored my side of the family for things. I'm not bitter about it - we did it too. Ours was a family that was centered around chronic illness, with my great grandmother having been the uniter having suffered with MS for much of her life. When she died, the big together family split off even more. But still, some of us keep (kinda) in touch.

My mom saved my life, literally, by refusing to believe my disease was leukemia, refusing radiation/chemo and biopsies. She fought tirelessly to find the real disease, to document my symptoms, and to deal with my father (read: douche; sperm donor) deciding that maybe he did want custody of me if he'd have to pay support. As my sister fell ill as well, she and I fought often as girls tend to do. But our illnesses have brought us even closer.

As a child with a chronic illness, other kids felt bad for me but they didn't understand. They were my friends nonetheless. In middle and high school, I found my niche - the best group of friends I've ever had. Together, we suffered through bullying, thesis papers, projects period, and International Baccalaureate exams. Some of us got full diplomas, graduated with honors, and became valedictorians (North Scholars) together.

And in college, I met the best friends I've ever had - my old roommate Katy and my boyfriend of over four years. I can share anything with the two of them. Katy and I don't get to spend as much time together as we'd like, because our schedules don't match up well sometimes. But when we do, it's wonderful. She intently listens, and we can both gripe about things and share our worries.

But my boyfriend is, and has been for so long now, the biggest help in my life. When he looks at me, he doesn't see illness, a collection of swollen joints and misfiring nerves. He sees me for me - or maybe sometimes more than I am. I am not gorgeous when I wake up... usually. He is so helpful and most of the time really really good about not judging me... and when he does get frustrated, he keeps much of it to himself. So he's pretty cool I think.

This quote is mainly directed at him, more than the others I've listed. I was so afraid to start medications and to get the medical attention I needed. He encouraged me. With his love, I felt strong enough to go to the doctor. And because of the courage I have - and the dreams I have for the future - I carried out my plans and began walking on the path I am on today. I am so, so very grateful for everything he does for me, and helps me to do.

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