Okay, I tried

But I couldn’t refrain from posting.

So my appt yesterday was short and sweet. I go in, tell Dr. M that I don’t think the Plaquenil is really working, and say that maybe we need to play with dosages.

“No, I don’t want you on any more steroids. We’re gonna put you on methotrexate.”

I expected it.

I was composed until I finished up with labs (only two vials – a miracle!) and got back in the car. I cried a fair amount on and off yesterday. I biked ferociously for an hour at the gym, before deciding to run away from things on a treadmill for a while.

I’m scared. I don’t know what it’ll do for sure. I have this vision of me with hair falling out, so weak and fatigued that I don’t want to get up, but with little joint pain. What a great trade off – feeling good enough to do things and be ‘normal’ except for being so tired you feel like death.

At least I have my new fluffy bed to console me.

3 thoughts on “Okay, I tried

  1. Hey, weird you are the 4th person whose blog I read that had a check up yesterday!

    Sorry for the news but I guess you expected it? You mentioned before you were thinking about it. I might be facing a similar fate soon so I can empathise.

    If it helps I know at least 8 people on methotrexate and none of their hair's fallen out. In fact most of them say it helped their arthritis a lot, it put 2 of them into remission. It can tire you out but so can the disease. I think the best thing to do is to start it with as much positivity as you can muster. If it doesn't work out, then you can stop.

    That's what I tell myself anyway, we'll see if I follow my own advice if I need to go on it!
    When do you start?

  2. I lost a little hair and after the first week I was not tired and never did get sick. Just when it was beginning to work, my labs showed my liver wasn't happy. Doc is not convinced it was the mtx though.

    Be gentle with yourself the first week or two. The benefits will most likely outweigh any negatives.

  3. I already started my folic acid supplements today, and Fridays will be my mtx days. Labs every two weeks for now, and then every month after that.

    I'm thinking that I'll just get a new short hair cut and if anything goes on with my hair, I won't notice as much 🙂

    I'm celebrating my last few days of mtx freedom by finishing off my sangria. And then I won't be tempted to drink more than the once a week I'm now limited to. Bah.

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