abuse, gif, ptsd

You need to watch The Unbreakable Kimmy Scmidt

I’ve got a new obsession – The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. The show follows Kimmy as she tries to start living a normal life after being trapped in a bunker for 15 years by a doomsday reverend. In the first episode, she and the three other ‘mole women’ appear on the Today show. As their shuttle leaves the set and is driving to the airport, she has them pull over and decides to stay in New York. Everyone back in Indiana, she’s afraid, will always see her as a victim. She wants to be someone other than that.

Throughout the show, Kimmy has a number of PTSD episodes. They, and her social awkwardness, interfere with work, her love life, and more. She takes a job as a nanny for a rich family and moves in with Titus, a fantastic singer whose life-long dream of hitting Broadway keeps getting smashed.

I actually started watching this show mid-PTSD attack. I couldn’t get a sexual assault experience out of my head. I knew that this show, while funny, also addressed PTSD issues. I thought it could snap me out of the flashbacks, and I was right.
This show is funny, but it also deals with some hard topics. She mentions a few times that there was ‘weird sex stuff’ when she was being held, but the show doesn’t focus on that. It doesn’t focus on her having to live with strangers or the logistics of girls mentally handling captivity. The whole show focuses on her life afterwards. She’s working to move on, fit in, and make something of herself, even though she’s still got so much growing up to do.

There is a scene in the first episode that resonated with me really well. She hasn’t told her roommate about her past (and really doesn’t tell anyone) because she wants to be normal. She goes through being robbed and then losing her job, and comes back to the apartment freaking out. She goes into a rant talking to herself about how she’ll never be normal.

It resonated with me so well because I have these often – not as often as I used to, but still at least once every day.

I also try to rap far more than this white girl maybe should.

But, I mean, clearly Kimmy and I both got skills so why hide them. Am I right?

We’re so similar though – it’s almost creepy.
I wasn’t kept in a bunker for 15 years, but I was homeschooled and cut off from others for about seven years – and not allowed to do much even after that. I wasn’t abused by Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne, but I was abused by another little girl growing up in addition to my mother’s (now finally) ex-boyfriend (whom she continued to see after I told her about the abuse). I didn’t just magically have to start living on my own with no skills whatsoever – I did have some. I am, though, incredibly dorky just like Kimmy.
I don’t know that I’d have it any other way though.

I do still believe in good, in the fact that people are inherently good but we’re all just so preoccupied with ourselves and our take out, instant gratification culture to see it. I love bunnies and my piggies and every single animal – even snakes. Most of all, I believe Sandra don’t need a man. You can do this all by yourself girl!

And I know that we can get through anything if we just take it tiny steps at a time. You know why? Because we’re tough!

And if you still don’t feel like you can handle something, you can always try to fool yourself.

I just finished watching the first season, exclusively on Netflix, who was smart enough to order a second season before filming even started. My therapist said she started watching it as well and she definitely appreciated the parallels between her patients’ lives and what this girl goes through.

Have you watched it? I’d love to hear what you think about the show!

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